Say What?

[Like some others in The Jungle I suffer from hearing loss. This is not due to listening to The Who at 120 decibels, but rather being instructed to fire a large caliber machine gun from a 3/4 enclosed metal perch on the fantail of the USS Kitty Hawk, CV-63. We were not provided with any hearing protection, and afterwards all the Midshipmen trainees experienced ringing in the ears. “Don’t worry,” the doctor in sick bay told us, “It will go away.” Now, 53 years later, I’m still waiting. I picked this up on Facebook and thought it might be helpful to anyone wondering why that ol’ Silverback has a blank look on his face. SB SM]

I keep a book of my Million Dollar Ideas, one of which was designed to address what I think is a common affliction. Have you ever noticed when you are trying to echo-locate a specific sound, how effective it is to cup your hands behind your ears? Why not make a product that does exactly that. For a fraction of what a pair of hearing aids cost you could have 90% of the benefit. This, I realized, was the idea to insure that my golden years would be swaddled in luxury. However, when I described the idea to friends, the response was universal:

“Bad idea.”


“Because they would make you look stupid.”

Do reading glasses make you look stupid? We could call them “Obamas.” I bet that guy doesn’t have a hearing problem.

“Trust me, bad idea.”

This idea came to me about 15 years ago. Due to the universally bad feedback, I shelved my idea, until today, preparing this post. Looking for a picture of someone cupping their ears, I came upon this, and realized that such a product now exists. You can buy them on Amazon. Called Dixie Hear Cups, they cost a mere $9.95, including shipping. They first became available in 2018. Mine are on the way. (BTW, they are customer rated 2.7 out of 5 stars, about the worst rating I have ever seen on a product.)

And, yes, they do make you look stupid.

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