[I’ve always been a man ahead of his time. This time I seem to have been roughly six decades too early. In our epic musical Old Rockers: The Musical Journey of Grendel, the character of Del writes his first song, No Remorse, about a love-em-then-leave-em kinda guy who callously leaves spurned, broken-hearted girls in his wake. His songwriter/partner Greg advises him to “stay within yourself” is his next creative venture. Del takes the advice quite literally in song #2 and comes up with I Think I’m in Love … about the pleasures and pitfalls of self-pleasurement. The song becomes a musical footnote until a generation later when, in a totally different environment attitudinally and technologically, it becomes a sensation. Here’s a scrambled version:
“Masterdating” is the latest term to describe what young Del was expressing back in the mid-1960s with “I Think I’m in Love.” It’s trending on TikTok. SB SM]
Holistic dating coach Amy Nobile says practicing self-love on a regular basis can aid in finding true love with a romantic partner. Getty Images
By Asia Grace
New York Post August 23, 2023
Singles in the city are self-pleasuring out in public. On any given night, you’re likely to spot a giddy guy or gal at a trendy restaurant, bar, museum or even a fully packed park, single-handedly going at it alone“It” meaning a solo date, of course. Get your mind out of the gutter. “Masterdating,” the latest love and relationship trend to take social media by storm, is the practice of lavishing oneself with choice gifts, treats and outings in an effort to establish a healthy sense of self-sufficiency before entering a serious relationship with someone else.
“Taking yourself out on dates is an exercise in self-love and self-compassion,” Amy Nobile, a holistic dating coach in the West Village, told The Post. “You’re teaching yourself about your own needs, requirements, the things that bring you joy,” she added. “It’s about uncovering your own passions.
As a relationship expert in the city, whose assistance with landing a soul mate in the city comes with a price tag of over $10,000, Nobile says flying solo can be just as exciting as being taken out by a handsome charmer or a smiley siren.
“Make a whole day of it,” urged the expert, who suggests “masterdating” at least once a week. “Send yourself flowers in the morning, send yourself a sweet note saying, ‘I can’t wait to see you tonight,’ schedule a fancy mode of transportation to get yourself to the date — make it a full day of love.”Online, the cheeky buzzword, which rings an eerie likeness to the word “masturbating,” has millennials and Gen Zs in a chokehold.
In fact, beneath the trending hashtag #MasterDating, with more than 1.6 million TikTok views, hopeless romantics are living happily ever after by wining and dining themselves. And social media fans of “masterdating” have seemingly elected Miley Cyrus’ hit “Flowers” — a 2023 self-love anthem the pop singer sassily dropped on ex Liam Hemsworth’s birthday last January — its unofficial chant, using the viral ditty as featured audio in posts dedicated to the trend. Serial self-suitor Valerie Chapman — an NYU grad based in Manhattan who’s admittedly taken herself on more than 100 solo dates since age 15 — touted the trend as “the highest form of mediation” in a TikTok testimonial. “Go somewhere … by yourself, say ‘Table for one,’” the 23-year-old tastemaker instructed her more than 42,000 fans. “You’re gonna walk in with your shoulders rolled back, order whatever you want, eat whatever dish you want, drink whatever you want … go crazy,” she continued before revealing the lone-rendezvous cardinal rule.
“No phones. Would you want your date to be on the phone [while they’re out] with you?” questioned Chapman. “No. So don’t do it to yourself.”And singletons aren’t the only ones enjoying a partnerless tryst. Kyle, a married medium from Australia who’s been hitched to his husband for nearly two decades, says he “masterdates” all the time. “For me … it’s being your own cheerleader, best friend, supporter. It is true self-love,” said Kyle in a post. “You’re not gonna pine and wait [for] a person to do this or that … F–k waiting. Give it to yourself.”
And Nobile agrees. “Don’t worry about feeling self-conscious or lonely about taking yourself out on dates,” she urged to The Post. “You’re a good time. You deserve to be treated well. Go enjoy being with yourself.”
And she says a shameless “masterdate” could result in a hot date with Mr. or Mrs. Right. “While you’re out enjoying yourself, your vibration rises — and the highest vibration is love,” said Nobile. “When you’re loving yourself, you become a magnet that attracts love from others.”